Some of you may have read and enjoyed our article cataloguing the best and worst of 1980's cartoons.
Undoubtedly, we left out a good few entries (He-Man, specifically). So much so, we decided to take another crack at it and try to condense your entire childhood into a list of cartoon intros.
Check it out!
10. THE RACCOONS
Why is it that Cyril Sneer and his cigar is the only thing that sticks out about this show? Is it because his nose looked like a.... No. No, this is a family show. We're not saying it here.
9. THUNDARR THE BARBARIAN
No joke, this show freaked us out. In the first five minutes, you're basically told that all human life has been wiped off the face of the Earth. Yet, somehow, monsters and half-dog / half-human people survive and it's up to a blonde guy with leg-warmers to save us all. Also, check out the opening monologue - his "fabulous" sunsword. Yes, it sure was fabulous.
8. SPARTAKUS AND THE SUN BENEATH THE SEA
We have absolutely no idea what this show is about. There was a talking ship and the main guy looked like Lou Diamond Phillips from Young Guns. We knew it played before Jo Maxi and that was it. That theme song, though, reminded us Frankie Goes To Hollywood or Toto.
7. CARE BEARS
You're a dirty liar if you say you can't remember the lyrics to this. Also, why did the younger bears have diapers? Did Care Bears poo? They lived in the clouds, so more than likely, that poo is going down on those kids they hung around with.
A vampire duck, made from ketchup, that had a vulture butler and sounded like Daffy Duck. The 1980's was truly a special time.
5. RAINBOW BRITE
Looking back on Rainbow Brite, we honestly get the feeling that she was an early activist for LGBT and feminist rights. Let's look at it. She was a self-possessed woman who had no time for the patriarchy - personified by Murky and Lurky, the two weirdos that were always perving on them. Not only that, she lived in a creative community with other women that promoted tolerance and self-acceptance. Or, y'know, it was just about a girl that liked rainbows. A lot.
We had Visionaries action figures that, if you held under a light, you could see these weird faces in the centre of it. Until James Connor decided to pull the legs off them and throw them down a gutter. Thanks a lot for that, asshole.
3. DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS
When Michael D. Higgins was elected, we knew what we were doing. Yes, we were electing a noted poet and politician, a gifted orator and a dignified ambassador for the nation. We were also electing the Dungeon Master from Dungeons and Dragons. We knew it. We said nothing.
2. HE-MAN AND THE MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE
No joke, Adam - that was He-Man's name before he held his sword aloft and became He-Man - was pretty well built to begin with. So stripping down to his skivvies so everyone could seen his gains wasn't exactly prudent. Not only that, Skeletor was also seriously swole for a guy that had no skin on his face.
Let's try to put Michael Bay, Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox's mid-rift out of our mind for a moment and remember a time when Megatron and Starscream had personalities and Bumblebee wasn't the primary focus. Bumblebee. Honestly.