The weather this week would understandably have most people planning a cosy weekend in front of the fire, so just embrace your inner layabout, get the munchies in and have a good long sit. You deserve it! You can't just be sitting around though without the remote in hand and to save your poor little fingers the trouble of endless flicking of the channels, we have compiled the best of what's on this weekend below.


Graham Norton

BBC1: 10.35pm (Times may vary between UPC and Sky)

Lovely lineup in store this week on Graham Norton. The legend that is John Cleese will be on to chat about his memoir ' So, Anyway', and no doubt his Fawlty Towers and Monty Python days. Joining him will be Miss Taylor Swift herself - don't really know how much craic she will be but she might surprise us yet. As well as herself, England batsman Kevin Pietersen will be on chatting about his book, which sounds very boring altogether but sure maybe he's a bit of a laugh. Last but certainly not least, veteran singer-songwriter Neil Diamond will be performing a song from his new album, Melody Road. Now, not bad 'ey?

The Late Late Show

RTE 1: 9.35pm

A nice enough lineup this week, nothing to write home about but grand all the same. Eamon Dunphy will be on to chat about the talk of the town this week - Roy Keane's book. No doubt he will have plenty to say on the topic. Also on the show is Noel Edmonds of 'Noel's House Party' and 'Deal or No Deal' fame, he will be talking about his career to date. No sign of Mr Blobby or the banker joining him though sadly. Finally, Majella O'Donnell will be on the show discussing her battle with cancer and of course, life with every housewife's favourite man - Daniel O'Donnell. You probably remember the last time Majella was on the show she took the very brave step of shaving her head live on TV ahead of her treatment, thankfully now she seems to be out the other end of it and doing well.

The Bourne Identity

RTE 2: 9.05pm

If a chat show isn't floating your boat tonight, then why not hang out with Jason Bourne for a bit. This is the first movie too so if this series has managed to sail past you, now's your chance to have a look, especially with all this talk of another film on the way. The story begins when a fishing boat plucks a man from the sea with two bullet wounds, a safe deposit number sewn on his skin and no memory whatsoever of who the hell his is or how he got there. Quite the conundrum. He sets about trying to find out who he is but seems to stumble across people trying to kill him along the way, which is no craic. However, when he discovers how capable he is of fending off attack, he starts to realise what a complex past he may actually have. Oh and he meets a cool lady along the way too, but you'll see all that.


The X Factor

TV3 & UTV: 7.30pm

After weeks of what worked out to be an excruciating audition process this year, the final twelve have been picked and the live shows are about to begin. All that remains to do before things get kicked off is to select the wild cards, with each judge picking an act for another judge this year. The theme this week for the contestants is number ones, which leaves it pretty wide open for the acts to pick a song that suits them. Let's just hope no one butchers an Adele song yeah? Results will be announced then on Sunday when one unlucky act will have to return to a life of obscurity like the rest of us. Tough break.

Euro Qualifiers: Ireland v Gibraltar

RTE 2: RTE 2

You'd nearly forget there was a match on this week with all this talk of Roy Keane's book. It's time to put it down now though and focus on the matter at hand, that of beating Gibraltar in this Euro 2016 qualifying match in the Aviva Stadium. Considering our opponents lost 7-0 home defeat at the hands of Poland in their opening fixture, we reckon we have this one in the bag. Although, let's not get too cocky just yet. Plus we still have the legitimate champions of the world to face on Wednesday when we take on Germany...which we are eh, not so confident about.

Adam and Paul

RTE2: 9.05pm

Hard to believe it's ten years since Lenny Abrahamson's Adam and Paul hit the big screen, but that it is. It follows a day in the life of two Dublin childhood friends who grew up to become heroin addicts. Throughout their day they go to extreme lengths to find the cash they need to feed their habit and find themselves getting involved in a series of bizarre misadventures. Truly excellent film with fantastic performances from leads Mark O'Halloran and Tom Murphy.



RTE1: 9.30pm

Let's be honest, we all spend the weekend waiting for this show, well, almost a million of us anyways as that's how many watched the opening episode last week. Nidge is delighted to be back in business after getting help from Paulie, although that pipe bomber is still out for his head so that be a bit of hiccup. No Lizzie to worry about anymore though sadly. #RIP. Over on the right side of the law, Moynihan finds himself wrestling with Garda bureaucracy. I guess that sting operation going wrong did him no favours. Speaking of, poor Tommy is still lying in the bed, will he ever have a fizzy orange again?

Downton Abbey

UTV: 9.15pm

If the shenanigans of Dublin crime lords isn't your cup of tea, you can head on over to UTV for a bit of Downton. We're already halfway through the current series would you believe, and it's been as drama filled as ever. Sarah is still carrying on with her one-woman war against the Crawleys, although she may finally push them too far. Violet eventually confides in Isobel the truth about their shared past, while Mary comes to a decision about her relationship with Lord Gillingham. There are also two returns to Downton as Thomas arrives, a shadow of his former self, while Rose's father Shrimpie is back with some pretty shocking news. Oh dear..

Alan Carr Does Deal or No Deal

Channel 4: 6.30pm

Another TV mashup tonight for Channel 4 as part of their Stand Up To Cancer Campaign, with Alan Carr taking on the banker in Deal or No Deal. Carr will have the support of friends and family with him including Melanie Sykes and Michael Underwood as he tries to guess the values of the famous mystery boxes in an attempt to win up to £250,000 for charity. The banker's temporary new assistant Angelos Epithemiou will even be popping his head in, with Noel Edmonds of course on presenting duty.

And if you are looking for some decent eats while watching any of the above, Centra is the perfect pit stop to grab a good feed from on any night in. Deals galore so they have!