Dear Conan O'Brien, Andy Richter (loved you in Arrested Development), the producers, runners, researchers, cameramen, that guy Jordan Schlansky, and all of Team Coco.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

We've watched and enjoyed your show for many years and, Conan, we'll even say that some of your episodes of The Simpsons ranked among the best of the entire series. We follow each other on Twitter and we've always appreciated how you're more than willing to go in weird directions, embrace different types of guests and find comedy and entertainment value in them. You're left alone, you do your own thing, and we love and respect that.

As today's our national holiday, and there's never more visibility on this island than today, how about a show in Ireland? Sure, you've done remotes from here before, but never a full show.

Conan Without Borders is a fantastic idea and we especially loved the most recent one set in Mexico - especially the guest-slot on the telenovela, which you could easily replicate here in Ireland. We've got at least two long-running soap dramas that you could turn up in, no questions asked. In fact, there's enough material in Irish pop culture, celebrity guests, musical acts, locations and overall potential here that you'd easily fill a week of shows, never mind a day.

You could interview the Gleesons and compare experiences as men of ginger hair. You've had Sharon Horgan on before, she could show you around her parents' Turkey farm in Meath. Colin Farrell used to be a linedancing instructor, he could take you to his old haunt and show you a few moves. Saoirse Ronan can take you for a nail treatment in Tropical Popical, since she loves that place so much. Michael Fassbender can take you down to Kerry and introduce you to the Healy-Raes. No, wait, that's a terrible idea. Scratch that.

Music guests? Hozier's always knocking around, James Vincent McMorrow, take your pick. Venue? There's the Olympia, the Helix, the Bord Gais Energy Theatre, there's even the grounds of Dublin Castle or you could even take over Ryan Tubridy's slot on the Late Late Show for one night.

Hell, you could even interview our President, Michael D. Higgins. Look at him.

All we're asking for in return for this is that you hook us up with a couple of decent tickets.


Your pals,