Everyone seemed surprised that Robert Kilroy-Silk got the boot last night (much to his wife's lip-licking delight *shudders*). His departure shouldn't be news, however, given his past indescretions. Also, when you break it down *busts out dance move* Nicola has the 'boob vote', both Martina and Brian have the 'gay vote' (although they're anything but in demeanor; pair of damp squibs), George Takei has the 'geriatric gay vote', while David Van Day has 'the vote' in general 'cause he's stark raving bats. He could, in addition, garner the gay vote considering his burgeoning gra with the Mallett (he even let Timmy squeeze his crotch sock during yesterday's show. Sensual), not to mention his stunning work both with Bucks Fizz and Dollar. No doubt he'll also get the odd vote from the terminally alone (it's his birthday tomorrow and, if his solitary mumblings are anything to go by, the 52-year-old is petrified his fellow campers will blank the occasion). All that being said; if he and the Mallett continue barking Biff, Baff, Boff at each other I might have to parachute into the bush armed with a staple gun.
One persona who'll be blanking any birthday celebrations with gusto will be DVD's arch nemisis'ss's's,Fun Bags McGinty. That's if she even remains in camp. According to The Sun, McClean woke up in a rather damp spot (you'd think she'd be used to that *jazz hands*) last night and hollered: "I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!" (the second time she's had the gall to yell the phrase). She then started packing, called for a meeting with producers and only simmered down when Martina introduced her on to the fact that she's lucky to be there. Thankfully, this was after Nicola had a chance to rant: "I'm soaking wet and my neck is killing me. This isn't fun any more. I'm sick of this, I'm going to call someone. I'm going home. How many times do I have to say I’m wet? It's no good, no-one gives a f*** about me." That's because you're a pair of glorified plastic bags, you over-inflated clone of a clone. But, it has to be said, you're industrial strength nail varnish is very impressive. How in God's name has it not chipped yet?
Either Hooty McBoob and her radioactive nails or the Plank Paddick should get hoofed tonight. Well, one can hope, anyway. Oooh, or Carly. The forgotten WAG. She's nice and pretty, yet instantly forgettable. Did she even get any airtime last night?
