Yeeeaaah. Unfortunately the theory doesn't always reflect the practical. See, you think that's what will happen but then you end up having an emergency C section which renders you useless for pretty much two months and - as for what child you're going to get - well, that's a lottery, innit. 

As Keira announced said birthing plan on Ellen, she was obviously joking. Let's hope she was joking. Either way, at least she's prepared for 'wee in the face' if it's a boy - which is something considering she looks totally baffled when presented with a baby changing table. 

If only every changing table came with a bar and a pee guard.