Now, instead of launching into the usual speil about the objectification of women, yaddah yaddah, the simple fact of the matter is - we as a species find the impossibly perfect female form scantily clad an exceptionally compelling sight. Sure every time we put a pretty lady on the homepage the click throughs sky rocket - you saucy bunch. And it's not as if any of these women are real anyway, this one hasn't even got a belly button and can therefore only be confirmed as an alien or sexy droid. 

Breaking up the onslaught of highly convenient and not-at-all cumbersome carnival, peacock, milk maid, thatch roof, Gone With The Wind, strong man, and tenuously sports-themed underwear (I'm getting this for the fellah), was a performance from Katy Perry and Akon - both of which near soiled themselves through sheer excitement alone.

Among the souls who lined up to partake in this thin ruse to ogle physically supreme beings walking up and down in a straight line, included the usual red carpet brigade (the simpHilton Sisters, Natasha Bedingfield, Estelle, Malin Ackerman, blaaah), and the sort of blokes you'd expect at a Victoria Secret soiree. Here's looking at you, Adrien, Adam Lavigne, and Vin Deisel. And Alan Cumming? Aaaah, riiiight