George Michael Caught in Jacks, Shocker.

Mr. Michael was nabbed smoking crack in a public toilet near Hampstead Heath in September. Prior to this, in 2006, the singer was caught "slumped in his car with drugs" twice in as many months. He got a playful pat on the backside in the form of a two year driving ban - something which would impact hugely on those who can afford chauffeurs.

Then there's the small matter of him getting caught "taking part in a lewd act in a Beverly Hills toilet" in 1998. Then, only last year, he was seen crawling from a bush in Hampstead Heath, followed swiftly by a middle-aged white van driver. Is Kenny Goss, his partner for over a decade, still with him? He is indeed.

The story went as follows: "The singer 'pleaded' with police as a 'conviction could get him barred from America, where he had an Aids benefit gig in November - his charity would lose £2million in ticket sales if he could not go.' A source told the paper: 'He was very emotional. He kept saying, 'Please, you'll ruin my career'.' Suuure, the police will be responsible for ruining your career... The source continued: 'His sob story worked - he escaped with a caution. He was even chauffeured home. He only got away with it because of his celebrity status'."