Madonna and her 22 year old boyfriend (with the emphasis on the 'boy' part of that word) have taken the big step of moving in together, only three months after they first met. Brazilian Jesus Luz was, only a few months ago, a poorly paid model who lived with his mother in his family home. He's given all of that up to move in with another middle-aged woman, in Madge's Upper East Side of Manhattan apartment. Madonna's even cooking for him. Reports that she's reading him bedtime stories and tucking him into bed each night are, at this point, unsubstantiated.

Staying in New York, Tyra Banks was indirectly responsible for a riot on Saturday. About 10,000 hopefuls, all of whom dream of one day crying and/or getting yelled at by Tyra on national television, were queuing for an audition of America's Next Top Model when apparently someone saw smoke come out of a car and assumed that a car was going to blow up. At this point about 20,000 stilettoed heels began tip-tapping furiously in different directions to escape this combustive car which, by the way, turned out to be harmless. The wannabe models, all under 5'7", went into a frenzy and charged the metal barriers that were either keeping them in the queue for the show, or separating them from the general public's gene pool, depending on your personal level of cynicism. "It was like 9/11 part two", claimed one of the hopefuls. Enough said.

-John Balfe

(Sheena McGinley is away)