"If I went to a psychiatrist, it would be a long session. I've always thought that I do have a number of issues that probably need dealing with, because I am quite odd in some ways. I get very dark moods for no reason. Nothing in particular brings it on. You can be having the best time of your life and yet you're utterly and totally miserable. I get very antisocial, depressed and irritable with people. I don't have time for them. I can't make phone calls and stuff... I just sit on my own for days. I'm not sitting in a darkened room, rocking. Things might have gone really well and then I torture myself. I cannot believe it. I have to find something to make me miserable... Someone said to me recently: 'You're like a human buffet table. Everyone comes and takes something from you and, at the end, there's nothing left'."
Yeah, a human buffet table made entirely of SOLID GOLD COINS. Although I do feel his pain. I too find myself weighed down, not with coins, but with a darkness for no apparent reason, and have to - for example - stop myself from manhandling strangers who stroll too slowly in the street. I largely refuse to converse with anybody on the phone and often favour a quite corner of solitude. It could be called self-preservation, but there's more of a "self-persecution" hum off it. I've yet to get to the bottom of why I enjoy torturing myself; as for Simon, it's the least he can do after unleashing Mr. Blobby on us.