No doubt you've seen this image of Calvin Harris crop up on social media and just about everywhere else.
— Minx Black (@MinxLDN) August 5, 2015
Yes, he looks like he's in perfect shape and it's no surprise he's the current squeeze of one of the world's most attractive women. But, it's comforting to know that, well, he didn't always look like this. Despite this, both he and Taylor Swift have been offered $10,000,000 to strip down for Armani - just to rub that point in.
More than anything, our entries below prove that with the right amount of personal trainers, dieticians to tell you what to eat and, y'know, money, you can look like an Armani model.
6. THAT GUY YOU SHIFTED AT THE LOCAL DISCO YEARS AGO
You're pretty certain that he's an accountant or something now. Your friend says that he's lost all the hair and that he's married and all.
5. HE USED TO PARTICIPATE IN LINE-UPS AT YOUR SECONDARY SCHOOL AND GOT SUSPENDED FOR SMOKING
— Guada â˜† (@ArgCalvinHarris) August 6, 2014
A line-up, for the uninitiated, is when a group of students line up along a hallway and wait for other students to walk down said hallway. The objective is to knock them over before they reach the end. It's horrible. And this guy looks like he knows how and what they are, the tosser.
4. THAT GUY WHO PLAYED IN THAT GRUNGE BAND THAT YOUR MATE WAS SEEING FOR A FEW MONTHS
— Nancy Dorn (@TheNannerz) January 9, 2015
They were going places back then. They sounded like Ash meets Helmut but, with, y'know, more edge to it. Still plays guitar at weekends, though.
3. HE'S BIG INTO BANTER. BANTER. BANTER. BANTER.
— RW (@drahcirnaw) May 15, 2015
He's a banter animal. He's listed Full Time Mad Bastard as his job on Facebook. His likes include Drinkin, Shmokin And Fightin' and Hardcore Raves In Portumna. He's the administrator of said page. He hasn't had a rave in Portumna yet, however.
2. HIS FACE KEEPS COMING UP ON TINDER, BUT YOU KEEP SWIPING LEFT
— Myriam (@Myri_10) July 29, 2015
No, no, no, no - ugh, him again - no, no, no, no, no, no.
1. HE'S BIG INTO DUNGEONS & DRAGONS OR SOMETHING, BUT...
He'll fix your laptop for you if you're stuck. He works in IT. (He doesn't, really)