Can't imagine why.
That aside, Simon Cowell has made "65 marriage proposals" but no woman will marry him. They'll just hang around him in groups on his yacht.
The 52-year-old music mogul - who is currently on a relationship break from his fiancee Mezhgan Hussainy - joked he has popped the question numerous times, but has always been turned down.
Speaking at an afternoon tea event earlier this week at London's Dorchester - which was hosted by his publicist Max Clifford in aid of the Shooting Star charity - he said: "The truth is no-one will marry me. I must have made 65 marriage proposals and no-one's said yes so it's probably not going to happen."
The X Factor overlord has previously admitted his relationship with make-up artist Mezhgan is "complicated" and has made him realise that he may never tie the knot.
He said: "It's quite a complicated relationship. We have had a break from each other, and we are still incredibly close, I'm vulnerable. It's not on, it's not off, it's somewhere in the middle. I don't know if I will ever get married, but I am happy."
Meanwhile, Simon's mammy, Julie Cowell, reckons they got engaged too quick... He's in his fifties, Julie, nothing is ever too quick.
She explained "I think [the engagement] was too quick. This might give them the break they need to think it through. Marriage is a very, very big step. It's a break at the moment. The problem with Simon is that he works so hard."
That's one theory alright.
