Charlie Sheen's insides have had enough, so they've had him hospitalised.
They aren't imploding as one might expect, instead they're making a bid for escape: a hernia has been reported as the cause of Sheen's hospitalisation.
Sky News reports: "The star of hit show Two and a Half Men was taken to Cedars-Sinai Hospital in a stretcher after partying with several women at his home, it is claimed. Sheen's publicist, Stan Rosenfield, told TMZ the actor was sleeping in the emergency room. The 45-year-old's father, actor Martin Sheen, and his mother, Janet Templeton, were at the hospital, a source said. 'It's serious,' a source at the hospital added". Probably the cleaner.
A Los Angeles City Fire Department spokesman confirmed that they had received a 911 call requesting help at the Beverly Hills address where Sheen lives. "We had one of our rescue ambulances, which has two paramedics, and we had one of our engines, which has four firefighters on board and one of our EMS commanders respond to that location. We transported at least one individual from that location to an area hospital."
Asked whether he had any details on Sheen's health, the spokesman said: "That would be a question for the hospital. We went there for a medical condition."
Rosenfield has refused to comment on accusations that Sheen held a "cocaine-fuelled wild party the night before", while "partying with several women at his home."
Insert "typical sentiment about him being determined to leave his daughters fatherless" here.