Ryan Seacrest's machinations have surpassed any form of humour. He MUST be stopped. But the man seems infallible; he managed to survive the broadcast of Denise Richards: It's (not) Complicated (at all) AND a shark attack… Nothing can halt him. That's why he has the balls to undertake the unthinkable. He's producing a sitcom starring Paris Hilton.

Seacrest tells Access Hollywood: "Paris and I are developing a scripted series. And she wants to have fun with that. So I think that this is a very clever show. Paris is going to star in it. Paris is going to play a very clever and funny Paris Hilton. Some of things that she encounters are really interesting. And if we pepper in a little bit of script, I think it’s going to be very funny."

WRONG. It will be the Simple Life with canned laughter. It will make The Hills seem relevant. You, Ryan Seacrest, are a lazy fool, with the imagination of a gnat and a bank balance the size of your behemoth ego. Somebody stop this blight before he creates a sitcom starring… Kelly Os... Kim Kar... Kimb... ARGH! There is no one worse!! *runs around room, smacking fevered forehead wildly*