Hang about, I thought Victoria was hell bent on winning over the American public after David's LA Galaxygate? I doubt they'll take kindly to being judged by someone with the vocal prowess of an underfed ferret.

Harsh but true. I've had the misfortune of earwigging some of the non-auto-tuned songs she attempted to release around 2002/2003. You know, when she tried working with Damon Dash and started wearing bet on boot cut jeans, Von Dutch t-shirts made for toddlers and half a curly mammoth piled upon her head.

She came into Windmill Lane Recording Studios (you might recall me mentioning that place the odd time) when I was working the reception desk (again, by "working", I mean answering the door; shooing away crazed Westlife fans; entertaining whoever happened to land down to reception to roll a "cigarette"; making coffee; organising couriers/taxis; and trying to locate a space for Van Morrison to park, which didn't involve him blocking everyone else in the building. Very stressful job altogether.

While working there, I had the chance to meeting many stars - and Victoria Beckham. She was pleasant. More impressive in the flesh to be honest. When she wasn't giggling about "sounding awful", she was attached to her mobile: "Hello darling, put Brooklyn on... HELLO BROOKLYN! MUMMY LOVES YOU! MUMMY LOOOOVES YOOOU!" She feasted on grapes, edamame beans and the odd sliver of steamed fish. She was one of the few "stars" who had security guards (plural), which she left in reception. With me. That was draining, especially since they weren't exactly the talkative type. That didn't stop them eating lunch at my desk and breathing coleslaw over the computer.

Anyway, let's not digress further, fact of the matter is - Victoria Beckham isn't exactly gifted in the vocal department, nor has she launched anyone's music career successfully (most notably her own), or written anything of note. She has only succeeded in marketing herself - which, I suppose, is half the battle.

According to a Sun source: "Paula's absence leaves a big gap on the judging panel. At least 25 million viewers tune in every week. It needs a big star. Simon Cowell and Victoria have always got on. It would be an incredible coup to get Posh. She was in one of the biggest girl groups in history so she knows what she is talking about. Simon Fuller is now speaking to her."

If anything at least she'll provide a buffer between Simon and Kara. He looked close to head butting the latter more than a few times during last season.