As an emaciated Marilyn Monroe inflatable doll, filled with hot air, layers of fake tan and spindly bones.
I jest, of course; Paris became the oldest Hollywood cliche in an attempt to promote her latest scent (not sure how many she's launched to date, but we've been lead to believe it's in the region of ten...). She (or rather the army of skeksis her parents have employed to keep her afloat) has called it Tease, as opposed to Eau de Simphilton.
Three recognisable faces seized the chance to pretend to be aroused by her throttled breasts, none of which came as a surprise; Adrien Grenier, Piers 'serious journalist' Morgan, and his mate Amanda 'Hey, I'm trying to cobble a name for myself over her too, you know' Holden.
It appears that Madonna also took the time to attend, if only to dab some drool off Paris's gob.
If Paris really has launched no less than ten perfumes, they're bound to start running out of marketing ideas soon. I mean, there's only so many more times she can truss herself up as something that used to serve a function and pout about with aplomb. They could always start re-launching certain scents - like, for instance, if Tease doesn't fly off the shelves, they can re-market it as "Tase', self-defense attractively packaged! See, no messy wires! Just use as pepper spray and be on your way!"
I'll get my coat.