Ah boo - Paris hasn't been trying to help inebriated elephants in India, can you believe the Daily Star made it up??! To refresh your memory; they reported that Paris was attempting to raise awareness regarding the plight of the oversized rice beer pillaging mammals going on a drunken rampage and quoted her as saying; "There would have been more casualties if the villagers hadn't chased them away. And four elephants died in a similar way three years ago. It is just so sad." However, the simpHilton recently claimed on the Ellen DeGeneres show: "I read that and I was like, 'How would an elephant get alcohol in the first place? Why would I talk about that? Why would I care if an elephant got drunk? Can an elephant get drunk?' I've never talked about that in my life. I didn't even know an elephant could get drunk... They always put words in my mouth all over the press all the time (reporters, not the wily elephants). I just laugh at them now. It's literally comedy every morning; we wake up reading these stories... My friends will send them on a BlackBerry to me and we'll just laugh." D'you know the saddest thing about this story? That was the only entertaining Paris story I've read all year and it's not even true. God, imagine what a bore she'd be if the press didn't put their twist on things? It'd be like watching One Night in Paris over 'n over...