I doubt she's absolutely thrilled, she's the 'Mammy' form of 'happy.' We'll get to that shortly.

A source initially said Patrick's mammy was not exactly impressed by Miley's recent birthday party "with all the penis pictures disgusted her. That was the worst thing Miley could have done. Maria is very, very worried about the influence Miley's having on Patrick. She fully believes that you become who you surround yourself with and she's always been so happy with the friends Patrick chooses, she never saw this coming."

Now, she's had something of a realisation. A random source speaking to People Magazine is currently saying: "It’s untrue that Maria is unhappy... If Patrick’s happy, she’s happy."

Yep, that's Mammy Code for "I'll say I'm 'happy' so he still feels he can talk to me when she starts messing him around, leading him down the wrong paths and generally RUINING HIS LIFE FOREVER!!! She BETTER be on birth control!"

Maria's obviously read the "Twenty things a mother should tell her son" and is relating to no.19 on the list: "Please choose your spouse wisely. My daughter-in-law will be the gatekeeper for me spending time with you and my grandchildren."