As it's a Bank Holiday weekend, we're treating you to not one but two Lindsay Lohan stories - WHOOOP! YEAH! No need to thank me, I'm just not arsed uploading two different pictures of her for separate segments.
Story A: Remember last year, when Lindsay went cuckoo bananas, hijacked a car after a horse load of honk at a party in Malibu and chased someone's mother for some reason? You know - she "pleaded guilty to being under the influence of cocaine and no contest to reckless driving and driving with a blood alcohol level of .08 or higher", and served one whole day in jail? Well, there were three male passengers in Lindsay's commandeered vehicle and now they're trying to sue her for "endangering all of their lives". Ronnie Blake, Jakon Sutter and Dante Nigro claim Lindsay "didn't care about the risk of death" and said "she was a celebrity... she could do whatever she wants." According to TMZ, one of the trio said "It was pretty much the worst night of my whole summer" (bummer dude), and they're collectively seeking "unspecified compensatory and punitive damages". Here comes the best bit and it's from Lindsay's lawyer, Ed McPherson: "These guys had the night of their lives, playing with the radio and leaving the vehicle at one point and getting back in." So that makes it all OK! Cocaine induced car-jacking is knob twiddling fun!* *I, of course, in no way condone cocaine induced car-jacking or the endangerment of lives.
Story B: Since the film roles aren't exactly cascading in, Lindsay's funding her expeditions with Samantha by making the odd TV cameo, the most recent being a stint on Ugly Betty. In a scenario straight from Mean Girls; it's been reported that her six episode role was cut to four as her and America Ferrera didn't get on. A production assistant was quoted as saying: "It was a mess. Lindsay would show up every day with an entourage of people. She smoked 24/7, and after she left, they had to repaint her dressing room it was such a mess." It's also been claimed that Lindsay "would obsessively cut pictures of herself out of the tabloids like she was creating some sort of scrapbook and refused to go on set until America was there - it was a power play." Seemingly the animosity came to a head during the recording of an episode entitled Granny Pants. According to the New York Post, the episode: "was about how Lohan, playing Betty's high school nemesis, would 'de-pants' Ferrera. But Ferrera exacts her revenge and pulls down Lohan's pants instead. 'Lindsay wasn't wearing any underwear,' the source said. But a Lohan pal fumed, 'Bullsh*t! Lindsay wears underwear all the time now (*guffaws*). She was wearing a G-string. And it was America's fault. They were rehearsing the scene and America wasn't supposed to pull Lindsay's pants down - but she did. Lindsay was so embarrassed, she started crying.' As for the dressing room, Lohan's pal said it was also used by the cast of the Fox sci-fi thriller Fringe. So maybe they messed it up. And an entourage? Yeah, she had her sober companion with her, as well as her manager, assistant and Samantha Ronson. Her publicist was there a couple of times. But so what'?"
So what, indeed. All I know is that I have this compulsion to tune into Ugly Betty to see that episode with Lindsay Lohan. Must tune into Ugly Betty to see all Lindsay Lohan espisodes. Must watch Ugly Betty now... *wanders off, Zombie like, in search of remote*... Ugly Betty not on. Must purchase series on DVD and perhaps Mean Girls or Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants... *goes on hunt for wallet*