If Katie's publicist is to be believed, she cut short her trip to Argentina due to "work commitments" - not because the locals started pointing out the obvious. No, not because of that.

Today's rags are reporting the following findings from an Argentine native: "Silvia is the only comparison locals have been making. They think Katie is trashy and fake just like Silvia and that she is only famous for her enhanced chest. Argentinians are completely confused about the relationship and don't understand why he would get involved with her."

The Silvia in question is a 53-year-old showgirl who has also enjoyed a "failed pop career, appeared in soft porn shoots, flopped on reality TV shows and had a string of boob jobs."

The future is bleak. And the future is increasingly orange.