Tattoos McNaziPants had to make it official considering he had a diamond branded Kat Von Dee swinging out of him at a red carpet event last weekend.

James, subtlety not being his forte, had this insensitive barrage for People Magazine this week: "You know sometimes the public and press gets it wrong. This is one of those times. 2010 was actually the best year of my life because I fell in love with my best friend (after having lots of sex with various skankier versions of her, not to mention my wife at the time). An amazing woman who stood behind me when the world turned their backs (speaking of backs, I had lots of supremacy sex with walking tapestries of self loathing behind Sandra's). I have never met anyone so kind and loving and committed to making the world a better place every day. My love for her is beyond description. So honored that she said 'yes.' Growing old with her is going to be a f****n' blast!"

Yeah, imagine what a blast they'll have pulling each other's skin in the nursing home playing "guess that tatt!?" Assuming James doesn't die of syphilis before the elderly sag really takes hold (he refused to use condoms with this).

In response to her ex-husband's jovial marital announcement, Bullock's rep said: "Sandra knew it was coming, and she was ready. It may seem like only yesterday that Jesse and Sandra split, but for her, life has changed so much that it seems like ages ago."

To recap, the 'Vanilla Gorilla' got caught banging Needles McGee in March 2010, before several other similar sorts came crawling forth, then Sandra divorced him last June.

Warp speed.