It's been just over a year so now it's clearly time for the blab-all book release.

Here's an excerpt from Jesse James' Memoirs Of a Philanderer (unofficial working title), which mainly centres around what a skeez he is. A poetic skeez, but one nonetheless.

"I admitted the affair. I told her the hard details. I let her know that I had never loved this woman, that I had never cared for her at all. The feeling of shame and sadness that washed over me as Sandy began to cry was almost beyond measure... I didn't touch her. I sat frozen in my chair, watching, as Sandy's small body shook with sobs. Sandy rose to her feet. She unfolded her sunglasses and put them on her face. She walked steadily and purposefully to the front of the shop, opened the heavy, metal door. For a moment, the sunlight enveloped her. The door closed behind her, and she was gone."

This guy fondles motorbike/tattooed lady parts for a living, who knew he had such a handle on prose? Although, he does come crashing back down thanks to the following conversation he had with his 7-year-old, who kept asking where the very dignified and "small bodied" Sandra had gone:

"I chew my lip as I consider my answer. 'Well, sweetie, the truth is, I have no idea. Daddy f*cked up, real, real bad, so your stepmommy decided to disappear for a few weeks'."