Something called the Best of British Talent Awards were held the night before last, courtesy by In Style magazine. It's their way of celebrating the BAFTAS, or summink. Anyway, tickle as I might, Google won't throw up a winners list for me, or a red carpet, so we'll have to make do with the likes of Corinne Bailey Rae hobbling across the cobbles outside Shoreditch House with the aid of a mate.

As it happens, given those joining her in the rain, the Best of British Talent is a slight misnomer. OK, so there's Thandie Newton (thank God for Crash, am I right Thandie?), Jonathan Ross and a slightly startled looking Heidi Klum (OK, she's German, but a celeb nonetheless) being led away by someone who believes himself to be Kevin Costner.

Other than that, the Best of British Talent largely stayed away, what with Jo Wood, Sophie Ellis-Bextor, The Only Way is Essex's miniature Jordan, Vanessa Saturdays, Margo Stilley, Alex Zane, Gemma Chan, Nicola bleedin' McClean, Eliza Doolittle, Mr. Hudson, Jameela Jamil's perennial left profile, Miquita and Grimshaw, Jodie Harsh, Paul Wellar's son... and if further exhibits of bleh were required - James Corden, ladies and gennlemen.