How becoming and royal of Kate's sister, no? P.Middy is just after signing a magazine column deal with supermarket chain Waitrose, in which she'll be offering "casual dining ideas and recipes" on a monthly basis. That book deal must have bombed worse than we all thought.

'Pippa's Friday Night Feasts' column, which will start appearing in the magazine next month, intends to build on her cutting edge advice like that given in her party planning book 'Celebrate' which was full of tips such as making sure to cut wrapping paper with 'sharp-bladed scissors. What can we expect from the column? Turning ovens on to a high heat helps to cook things? Use knives to chop and spoons to stir?

'I'm delighted to be writing for Waitrose Kitchen, a magazine that's always been a source of inspiration to me for its extensive spectrum of food and beautiful style,' Pippa said, 'My column will be an exciting opportunity to share my own passion and enthusiasm for food and entertaining.' Doesn't that just sound fascinating? Julia Child eat your heart out. Nigella must be quaking in her boots. Wonder if there'll be any tips on how to eat and get that great Middleton bum?