There's a load of unrest amongst the contestants as they've mysteriously figured out each other's wages. Dani is getting £40k. Martina is getting: £30k. Esther Rantzen is on £25k. George Takei: £20k. Robert Kilroy-Silk: £15k. WAG I (AKA Carly Zucker) is getting £10k, while WAG II (AKA Twiglet Tits) is earning £7.5k. I've no idea what Simon Webbe, Brian Paddick and Joe Swash are on but I reckon the latter would do it for free. Zucker initially sided with her fellow WAG until producers explained that she was a nobody and, as a result of being on the show, some magazines might pay her to take her clothes off. Nicola McLean/Abi Clancy/Tara Reid, on the other hand, is under no illusions regarding her status: "I don't think people are going to know who I am to be honest. Which, actually, is going to be embarrassing when I walk in the room. They're just going to think that I'm a dumb blonde and that's great. I agree with Pamela Anderson: 'Act dumb and no-one expects anything from you'." And what's dumb about that?! Why, that's a life choice - quick, spread the word to all the young girls thinking about going to college! Tell them to spend their fees on highlights and Fake Bake and fake bits instead - WHEEEEEEEEEE!

Meanwhile, George Takei was more concerned with getting out of the airport rather than his comparitively measly pay. The 71-year-old was left stranded after his flight: "I've no idea what I'm getting into, but now it seems it is a complete shambles. I've been left wandering the airport for 30 minutes on my own. They didn't give me any phone numbers or contacts, but I was assured there would be someone to meet me here. I can't believe I've been treated like this." Its going to be a long couple of weeks for George.