The 27-year-old Brazilian wan (yup, TWENTY SEVEN...) who was classy enough to record Justin Beiber, post coitus, and then launch the footage into cyberspace, is determined to make the most of her fifteen minutes by banging on about the singer's manhood. We told you this article would set you up for lunch. Chipolata, anyone?

Speaking to The Sun, Tati (apt name) Neves said the other day: "Take it from me, he's well endowed... and very good in bed. A man must know what to do to make me happy. Justin did all that and more. It was one of the best moments in my life. It was marvellous and unforgettable." OK. Burrito, anyone?

Tati - who has a five-year-old daughter with her estranged husband - claims Justin invited her and lots of other beauties to his Rio villa last week, but ultimately had eyes only for her and the pair soon legged it to the bedroom. The Brazilian claims he insisted on playing his own music while they had sex and he even begged her to come back for more after she had left.

Tati claims: "He has quite a fit body and he looked great naked. I didn't [go back] because I was exhausted. I just didn't have the strength. Justin has so much stamina." Brill, anything else Justin's people have possibly paid you to impart, or is that it?

Meanwhile, the brunette minx is adamant she didn't post the now infamous clip of herself and Justin online, saying she filmed the video to prove to a friend she was indeed with the pop star: "I was still in bed with Justin when my friend texted me to say, 'Oi amiga, where are you?' I texted back, 'I'm here in bed cuddling up to Justin Bieber.' The video was just for her eyes only. I am really angry with her."

Aaah, so your "friend" uploaded it to the internet. Tsk, unblieberable... C'mon, I wasn't going to only use it the once.