Why not? Because he's Eddie f*cking Irvine! He drives super fast cars and hangs out with Rod Stewart's ex in Cannes, 'n sh*t! Ah no, we're only joking.

So why is he being imprisoned anyway? He got a bit lary in a Milanese nightclub. Got a bit handsy with a glass and tried to poke it in someone's face. Because he's EDDIE F*CKING IRVINE! Apologies, joking again.

Cast your minds back to Christmas 2008. The 48-year-old Norn Iron native allegedly got up the nose of one Gabriele Moratti, the son of a former Milan mayor, when Irvine sent a text message to a lady friend with whom he'd recently enjoyed a relationship.

Yesterday, both Irvine and Moratti were both found guilty of causing "mutual injury" and were both sentenced to 6 months in prison. As it happens, neither of them will have to serve term because of the Italian legal system. UTV News reports: "Both men are set to appeal and, as the statute of limitations runs out at the end of 2015, the case will likely be declared null and void."

Of the rumours that the scrap stemmed from unbridled jealousy over some bird, Moratti's lawyer said: "It's easy for newspapers to say they fought because of jealousy over a woman, that they were two men who were rivals for her. It's a nice story. But in reality that's not the case."

So, in reality, what is the case? Apart from him being EDDIE F*CKING IRVINE??! Ah no, in reality the BBC said the duo reportedly blamed each other for the fracas which apparently happened in the club's VIP area. Needless to say, they also said the other one was holding the glass.