Cillian. Is there anything you'd like to talk about? Are you sure? You look like you've got the weight of the world teetering on your cheekbones, and don't get me started on the unruly tie.

All's not lost, however, we can still bask in the glow of Christian Bale's warm grin, and Tom Hardy's strength of vulnerability  and Joseph Gorden-Levitt's delightfully snug suit.

As for the ladies, both turned up in white, and Marian Cotillard's sugar plum fairy avec jaundiced eyes just about clinched it over Anne Hathaway's increasingly wan appearance. And it's not just the hair. In fact, I like the hair. The hair she had to do for a role, but she didn't have to do that dress for love nor money. Puckered, wilting and - dare we say it - a bit cheap looking (although Zoe Kravitz does take the aforementioned to a new level). It no doubt feels amazing to the touch, but that doesn't translate here.

P.S. Melania Trump, is it cold in New York in July (never), or were you just really pleased to be there?