Cherydddle Cole's mum has reportedly 'washed her hands' of her daughter after she refused to listen to her pleas to not get back with her ex-husband Ashley. Joan, 51, is said to have gone to Spain (I'm not sure how she afforded to fly there without her daughter's help, but sure needs must) after failing to convince Cheryl to stay away from her ex, who she divorced last year amid allegations that he had been unfaithful. Repeatedly. With below par bottle blondes.

According to The Sun, Joan told Cheryl, "You've made your bed with Ashley, now you have to lie in it," and added to friends, "I've washed my hands of the whole mess." Apparently Cheryl's "manager" is said to be equally furious after hearing reports that the Chelsea footballer stayed over with Cheryl at their former marital home one night - even if they did sleep in separate beds - because he doesn't want it to damage her career/his chances of bedding Cheryl himself.

By all accounts, the only person still talking to Cheryl is her Girls Aloud bandmate Kimberley Walsh (AKA the other one without a job). A source told the newspaper, "She is blinded by the hope of a future with Ashley. Her mum has told her there's nothing more she can do. And is demanding to know what's going on. Cheryl feels everyone has abandoned her. Her only friend is Kimberley and sadly, Ashley. He's had a game plan to win her back for months. It's all falling into place..."

... much like the influx of Cheryl-related "news pieces" in the run up to the BBC announcing their judges for The Voice. Snore.