Who thought Big Brother 8 contestant Chanelle could surpass herself after releasing that video of her fornicating with a puppet on the internet? Well, she's only let herself be invaded by Celeb Big Brother favourite Verne 'The Ram Raider' Troyer.

The Sun, as always, was on hand with the finer details: "Chanelle Hayes bedded Mini Me Verne Troyer after they spent all night flirting and smooching in a night club, according to reports. The pair left together in the early hours, with a newspaper describing their evening as 'a sex and booze rampage'... Her friend told the paper: 'She now knows size doesn't matter. Verne may be a little fella but he knows how to have big fun!' Chanelle added: 'Verne is a real ladies' man and certainly knows what to say to the ladies. He may be small but to be honest he has really cut my other boyfriends down to size'."

I'd like to thank Chanelle's friend for forever ruining Inner City's classic dance anthem for me, and the following source for offering this spectre: "He was pretty drunk and was loving the ladies. He is a real flirt anyway. But when he saw Chanelle turn up, he ditched the vodka and made sure he was introduced to her... (wait for it) He was like a Jack Russell on heat."