Lord, *heaves*, how macabre is this... Brigitte Nielsen has invited cameras to record footage of her having plastic surgery, which is being broadcasted in Germany under the guise of Reality TV. The show, called Aus Alt Mach Neu (Turning Old Into New), treated it's reported 2.5million viewers to the sight of fat being extracted from the actresses hips on Sunday night. Here's the macabre part - she plans to "auction off the fat for charity." Talk about an inflated sense of self-importance. Who'd want her hip lard, bar a dubious cosmetic manufacturer? And why would they pay over the odds when they can freely ambush sheep for a fraction of the price? It gets better... when the series is complete; Brigitte plans to reenact her 1988 nude spread for Playboy: "Twenty years ago, I did the cover of Playboy... I wanna do Playboy December this year. I'm gonna be 45." If that doesn't finish Hugh Hefner, nothing will. I just hope to god she doesn't give her ex-mother-in-law any ideas.

The first person to correctly guess who this gentleman is can give themselves a fervent pat on the back.