So the Aaahrfur junket has finally trundled in to Laahndan.
There were no impressive portraits from his cracked out days, or the consumption of giddy children's heads, but he did wheel along Katy Perry- who came as a fleshy mermaid. Or a petri dish housing disco mould. Or a bursting constellation in a beige universe. It's hard to see what in fact she's wearing as her groin was glued to Brand's hip for the duration. Either way, it's unremarkable, but the photographers did like the coverage it gave her rear view.
Never before have I been treated to such an abundance of arse shots courtesy of WENN. They've not been relayed here as, quite frankly, they fell curiously flat. She did try to make up for the bum note (apologies) by displaying her contortion skills, but not everyone's turned to jelly by bendy birds.
As ever, the premiere was attended by an (e)X Factor contestant, hanging on to the last strings of relevancy before the next batch are unleashed; Caroline Flackin very covetable booties; a couple of generic dolliers A and B; a regrettable ensemble; the friend who was made come; an eager starlet; Mark Ronson; and Dame Helen Mirrenthrusting everyone into the shade. Is there anything she can't pull off?
**Update** We just got in some footage from the premiere itself so, why not take a hop, skip and a jump over to eiTV
