I know this is being posted slightly later than usual, but sure you didn't even get a roundup last week (Nagiete got her marching orders, essentially for blindfolding children and letting them roam near a roadway, not to mention being rubbish in the boardroom. Will managed to escape the line of fire again, despite him pronouncing Cadbury's something along the lines of "cabbage." Last week's Line Of The Night was from Panos: "I had white stuff on my face, Bill... nothing major"), so really anything is a bonus *ahems*
Last night, Elev8's lone female representative decided she was the one to project manage a task which involved creating a 90second viral for Appleby's - even though Panos works for Google. Yep, Tara - miss "to be totally honest, at the end of the day, I'm basically 100%"breathless (honestly she sounds like she's just ran from the icecream van to tell her mammy "thatthemanisherewiththeicecream *gasps* andIwanthundredsandthousandsandaflakeandacornetto *gasps* andabottleofpopandsoon") - thought she was the women for the job, even though she thought a viral was a TV ad but on the internet. No, darling, virals are duplicitous lies that let you forget you're being bombarded by advertising. Shame it took Panos day one of the task to get this through to the alleged contents of her noggin. As a result, herself and Panos spent day two of the task trying to enlist the talents of a violinist who clearly wasn't in possession of a work permit to play at their function, while Will and Jamie (tweedledum and tweedledweeb) thought swaddling an Appleby's box in a towel would signify the preciousness of childbirth despite the client requesting a Christmas theme.
Fusion, meanwhile, had Niamh at their helm. She opted to go with two geriatrics kneeing each other in the nuts in a kitchen on Christmas morning - although I believe Barry thought he was directing a porno. On the upside, they managed to put on quite the function to present their viral, unlike Elev8 who delivered two irate musicians (Tara fluffed the budget and let Jamie to tell them only one of them could get paid. This looked in no way set up. In NO way), and "the worst presentation in the history of The Apprentice" thanks to Tara. It went something like: "We're here to, eh, promote Appleby's ad campaign for their, sorry launch their website for their, eh, sorry, viral, sorry for their sorry website. Eh, eh, eh, sorry, eh, humour, eh, eh, sorry *gasps* eh, eh..." Hey, at least she knew how to pronounce Viral, unlike Will who kept calling it "vinyl."
Funnily enough, Fusion won the task and they were sent on a spending spree tooooooOOOO.....??!! Smyths Toystore. Not Appleby's . Tara brought back in Panos and "will, I will, I WILL bring in... Jamie." As expected, they both ganged up on Panos, saying it was his fault they were too thick to grasp the concept of a viral. In the end, after Bill said "virydl" many, many times, he fired Tara for being rubbish. She then reappeared on You're Fired dressed like someone attending a 5-year-old's birthday bash and nearly sent her boyfriend hightailing for the hills.
Line Of The Night: Will saying "Hiya, yeah, I need to get some backing music for my vinyl."