All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That, in an extreme bout of celebrity incest, Rhys Ifans bedded Kimberly Stewart on Tuesday night after getting "pretty carried away with the kissing and the grinding" at London's Bungalow 8... That, if Rhys continues his quest to bed all of JudeLaw's exes, Lily Cole should start running now. He's probably already had a whirl off Sadie Frost... That, if you're living in Dublin, you should keep your peepers peeled for Adam Sandler, who's rocking about town from tonight... That Alicia Keys and Jack White are joining forces to create the theme tune for Quantum of Solace... That it will be the first Bond title theme duet in history, and to think it could've been Mark Ronson and Amy Winehouse... That Guy Ritchie was inspired to say: "Sugar kills. Think of the calories in sugar. Fat kills more people than anything else. Sugar is responsible for a lot of deaths, arguably more than crack cocaine"... That this statement then naturally led him to comment on Pete Doherty: "It's either genius marketing or a happy - or unhappy - accident. It's creative self-destruction in the sense that he's doing it creatively"... That there's nothing creative about mangling oneself... That, of the George A. Romero inspired photographs of Madonna shot recently, her rep Liz Rosenberg rustled this sentence up: "I just think the photographer got a bad shot of her or it was touched up to make her look bad. I saw Madonna two days before at her rehearsal and she looked amazing - glowing skin and working really hard on her show"... That Jennifer Lopez has landed a role as a professional thief in a new film entitled The Governess... That predictably, it's written by Kevin Wade, the genius behind Maid In Manhattan... That Simon Cowell has finally dumped Terri Seymour... That a "friend" of Cowell's has been quoted in the Star saying: "He told me he is tired of Terri's insecurities. They lead separate lives, and that's how he likes it, but lately she has turned up unannounced at events he is at"... That Cowell is getting over the break-up by holidaying in St Tropez with his ex-girlfriend Sinitta and, eh, Paul McKenna. That threesome visual will lurk in my brain for an eternity... That, of randomly popping up to kiss Sarah Jessica Parker in a Sex And The City spin the bottle scene, Alanis Morissette said: "I kissed Sarah Jessica Parker. I played a lesbian in Sex and the City and I had to kiss her. I have experimented with same-sex relationships in my life, but it wasn't about enjoyment with Sarah Jessica. Her character was supposed to be reluctant about getting involved, so it wasn't a passionate kiss - it was a reticent one, which is the reason I didn't enjoy it"... Yeah, that's the reason... Alanis is still clearly traumatised, considering said kiss occurred in 1999... That 49-year-old Kyle MacLachlan has become a father to a baby boy... That Lance Armstrong and Kate Hudson have called it a day on their summer fling - "they both decided it wasn't feasible"... That Ali Lohan was shown going to a casting session with legendary porn/horror director Peter Davy in a recent episode of Living Lohan... That Davy has directed such flicks as Breast Wishes 14, Bun Busters 12, and is credited with "discovering the porn star Houston"... That, when questioned, Ali's rep said: "she obviously - as a 14-year-old - had no idea about Davy's past"... That her mother sure would... That Shia LaBeouf did not cause the accident which lead to his DUI conviction... That it was in fact caused by the other driver who "failed to stop for a red light"... The fact Shia couldn't inform the police of this in the first place proves just how locked he was...