All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That Bill Bailey is leaving Never Mind the Buzzcocks after an 11 series stint... We kind've knew that was in the offing when Noel Fielding took over as team captain for three shows in the last series... That Noel must've failed to impress (it's possible!) as producers are lining up guests to fill the slot in future, including Mark Ronson, Frank Skinner, Johnny Vegas, Bob Mortimer, and Dermot O'Leary... That Simon Amstell and Phil Jupitus will return as normal... That Simon Cowell has lined up Britney Spears to perform during an X Factor live show... That Lynne Spears failed to ingratiate herself by saying the following during a TV interview to plug her book: "The Rolling Stone interview, we were so in awe. She's (Britney) just beginning. She's just coming on the scene. We didn't really know what we were doing. We were in shock at what was going on, and we were in awe. We didn't have any choice in the pictures. We had no one that could tell us what we were supposed to be doing"... That the interview was conducted from Lynne's playpen. She wore a super-cute pink romper suit and had to be pried away from her lollipop... That, at a preview performance of Katie Holmes' stage debut (otherwise known as All My Sons), Tom's arrival caused the audience to "collectively gasp"... The source continued: "Hollywood's most famous Scientologist mingled and shook hands with some other theatregoers who took photos and clapped. He then hugged Dustin Hoffman, who was sitting a few rows away, which drew another cheer inside the theatre"... The reporter then managed to make reference to Katie's performance: "Holmes delivered her lines with confidence and danced around on stage with gusto. She wore a brown shoulder-length hairpiece to hide her trendy pixie cut"... That's nice... That David Walliams said: "My elder sister used to dress me up when I was young. I think we should live in a world where it is not really an issue. The truth is that it doesn’t really mean you are gay - as anyone who has watched Kilroy and seen transvestite truckers and soldiers being interviewed next to their long-suffering wives will know"... That Kimberly Wyatt (the Pussycat Doll who takes umbrage at being called a stripper but is comfortable with being a stripper) is under the illusion people care about what goes on in her brain: "I've kept a journal since I was 17. Along with my iPod, my journal is the one essential I take on tour. I haven't spoken to any publishers yet, but when the time is right I'd love to share my story with the world"... Whatever, gis a twirl there, Kimberly... That Heather Mills has sued her ex-publicist, Michelle Elyzabeth, for calling her "a witch" and "a calculating, pathological liar and the biggest bitch on the planet"... That The Hills' Audrina Patridge has moved out of her "home" with Lauren Conrad and Lauren Bosworth to star in her own spin-off show... That, of Obama declining Lindsay's offer of campaign help, her father Michael elbowed his way in with: "Everyone is entitled to an opinion and so is Obama and his staff. Then again, you know what they say about opinions. Unfortunately, for them, to make such a comment about my daughter was a big mistake ... Look at Angelina Jolie and the wonderful things she has done in her life, and now watch how Lindsay does the same"... That Girls Gone Wild 'creator' Joe Francis said: "Lindsay's straight. I think Sam has taken ownership of Lindsay. I think if Sam were to let Lindsay go even that much; Lindsay would revert back to being straight"...