That my two-year-old Godson sneezed in my face over the weekend... That the incident has rendered me incapacitated with a cold, which in turn means less than stirring gossip segments today, my apologies... That RTE have commissioned an Irish version of Dragons' Den... That I'd name the host and the Dragons' themselves but they're not exactly celebrities so we'll leave them off... If you have some "investment ready" entrepreneurial wizardry up your sleeves, you can possibly appear on the show by calling 01 4066433... That Kerry Katona had a photoshoot to say goodbye to her GG udders "just hours before going under the knife"... That her (MTV funded) operation cost £19k (she had a wee bit of lipo too) and it's worth every penny according to her husband, Mark: "She's loads trimmer and she looks exactly like she did when I first started seeing her. I much prefer her like this. It's like I've got another bird in bed with me"... That makes a change... That London's Leicester Square was overrun with screaming pre-teens at last night's UK premiere of High School Musical 3... That Zac Efron said: "It's crazy and insane here, we saved the best to last in the school trip. It's a reality check when we get such a reception"... That said, he doesn't plan to appear in High School Musical 4... That Gordon Ramsay and his four children were amongst the guests, with the chef saying: "It's great for the kids to have such positive role models"... Yep, role models who appear to be moulded from plastic, and have their muffs on the internet... That Kirsten Dunst said: ""I started to write a musical a few years ago and I'm going to get back into writing it. But I'm not going to say what it's about though"... That Simon Cowell has been bolstering his X Factor finalists, before their first live show, by conversing with them through his PA... That Simon hasn't seen his group "since early September" with one show insider saying: "He's not exactly been hands on. Simon is busy but he could have called to make them feel special"... That, in contrast, Cheryl Cole has had her girls "over for dinner" and is in constant phone contact... That finalist Alexandra said: "She even texted me at 2am last night to see how my hair was doing"... That's annoying... That Halle Berry has been named The Sexiest Woman Alive by Esquire... Upon receiving the award, Berry said: "I don't know exactly what it means, but being 42 and having just had a baby, I think I'll take it (awwww!). Sexiness is a state of mind, a comfortable state of being. It's about loving yourself in your most unlovable moments. I share this title with every woman, because every woman is a nominee for it at any moment" (OK, now she's taking the piss a bit)... That George Lucas is considering filming a fifth Indiana Jones Film... A source said: "George is in think-mode right now"... That his biggest quandary is how to reanimate Harrison Ford's corpse... That heavily pregnant Ashlee Simpson celebrated her 24th birthday with a 'White Trash' party... How very crazy... A guest said: "Ashlee wore Daisy Dukes and platform flip-flops (not recommended for the pregnant) with a bathing suit and a fake tattoo around her belly... Joe (creepy dad) wore a cut-off muscle T-shirt and a mullet wig. It was funny. Jessica was wearing a crazy leopard-print dress that showed off a lot of cleavage"... There's no reference made to Jessica and Ashlee's mum as Joe probably forgot to let her out of the basement... That, just when you thought it couldn't get more trashy, "Christina Aguilera, Nicole Richie and Joel Madden attended the event, where party food included corn dogs, macaroni cheese, chicken fingers and French fries"... That the press is making a big deal about Jennifer Lopez saying she'd have no problem sending her twins to a Scientology School... That Lauren Bacall said of Tom Cruise dumping Nicole Kidman: "Tom had taken off for (girlfriend) Penelope Cruz or some goddamn thing - one of his more ridiculous moves. Tom Cruise is a maniac. I can't understand the way he conducts his life"... That Nick Nolte's house caught fire yesterday... That he suffered minor injuries and is blaming a "faulty printer" for the blaze... That be probably blacked out on a bed of smouldering cigarettes... That Tim Burton has branched out wildly by having Anne Hathaway join Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter as cast members for his Alice in Wonderland adaptation... That Hathaway will play the White Queen... That Boy George recently said: "When I started this tour, I thought, 'Who is going to want come and see me after all this time'. But when you get to Norwich and Newcastle, I mean, all these weird people come along to see you, all these old ladies who dance and sing along to Karma Chameleon and shout, 'I f**ing love you George'... they were all my mum’s age; it was really sweet and really funny. I've become Barry Manilow!"
