All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That Justin Timberlake starred as "a daaaancer" in a parody of Beyonce's new video on Saturday Night Live... Feel free to marvel at his industrial denier tights (the man is strapped down to the point of infertility. And, my, hasn't he got a long torso - like a hound on its hinds. I still wouldn't refuse him a fiddle, however)... That, of her comeback, Britney Spears has been quoted as saying: "I think it's too in control. If I wasn't under the restraints I'm under, I’d feel so liberated. When I tell them the way I feel, it's like they hear but they're really not listening. If you do something wrong in your work, you can move on, but I'm having to pay for a long time. I never wanted to become one of those prisoner people. I always wanted to feel free"... Britney's not happy... Some sources say that Jamie Spears, a recovering alcoholic, has been spotted guzzling frothy glasses at a bar... Other say it was merely a soft beverage that comes in draft form... That Heather Locklear has been officially charged with DUI after being nabbed madourvit in September... That Kate Hudson has been clocked flirting with Madonna's A-Rod... A fellow guest at the launch of the Fontainebleau Hotel in Miami said: "Hudson had her arms completely wrapped around A-Rod's waist and every time he leaned over to talk to anyone she would pull him back toward her. They were laughing and giggling all night"... That Paris Hilton was pictured having her hair stroked by her ex-boyfriend Stavros Niarchos in the same hotel over the weekend... That Criss Angel is having a sitcom based on his life...That a new Wallace and Gromit animation will air on Christmas day on BBC1... It sees Wallace fall for an actress, while Gromit get the hots for her pet poodle... The half-hour show took "20 months to make"... That ChristopherLloyd's home has been consumed by the Californian wild fires... That the 70-year-old's house was worth in the region of $6million... That Kelly Osbourne has changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'Engaged'... That Sacha BaronCohen's Bruno character managed to infiltrate the set of Medium by "posing as an extra"... He was "forcibly removed from the set after interrupting a tense courtroom scene"... That Cohen has auditioned a flurry of professional gay porn stars to feature alongside him in Bruno: Delicious Journeys Through America for the Purpose of Making Heterosexual Males Visibly Uncomfortable in the Presence of a Gay Foreigner in a Mesh T-Shirt... A source says: "Cohen and director Dan Mazer auditioned ten actors for the roles, ultimately settling on Paul Barba (AKA Tony Capucci) and John Martel (AKA Tyler Saint). In the scene, Cohen's campy Austrian journalist enters Burbank's Armano Hotel with some other men who try to get Bruno to join them in a five-man orgy upstairs. Though Bruno refuses to join the orgy, he watches them from the window"... That Kylie Minogue will host the BRIT awards next year... That America's TV Guide Magazine have listed the following as their Top TV Action Heroes: 5. Magnum P.I; 4. Sydney Bristow (Alias); 3. Jack Bauer (24); 2. Buffy The Vampire Slayer; 1. MacGyver... That Patty and Selma are most pleased... That Ryan Adams recently said: "Fame is an unnatural construct and those who go in search of it are the least likely to find it. I mean, really, does anyone want to sit through a show by The Killers? What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, unfortunately with the exception of The Killers"... That, of Rumer's movie career, her father Bruce Willis said: "She sat us down and said, ‘I know you two think you're big shots, but I don't want any help'. And she went off and got work on her own"... She must've sat them down for that chat when she was about 7-years-old, considering she starred alongside a parent in Striptease, Hostage and TheWhole Nine Yards...