That installment of Rumours features Audrina Patridge getting dumped; Britney being deluded; Michael Hutchence; Susan Boyle's knee; and Pete Wentz getting a lap dance.............................. That Demi Moore has asked Susan Boyle to sing at her and Ashton's anniversary... That Demi will pay "the Hairy Angel £30,000 to perform at their Hollywood party in September"... A source said: "Demi and Ashton think Susan is absolutely brilliant, in a fantastically unique and kitsch way. Demi joked to Ashton about booking Susan to sing for him. She wanted her to lift up her skirt and flash her knee, the way she did with Piers Morgan. And Demi has teased Ashton that Susan would eat him alive. The idea is a cocktail party at home in Los Angeles, the highlight being Susan singing"... That Britney Spears plans to meet The Queen while she's in England: "Britney's schedule has been crazy from the minute she hit our shores. But no way does she want to leave without visiting the Queen. She has told her aides she is desperate for her sons to rub shoulders with royalty. And she does not want to be disappointed. Britney loves everything the Royal Family stands for (inbreeding?), so this would make a dream come true"... That - as predicted - Chris Pine has dumped Audrina Patridge: "Chris Pine was forced to dump Audrina because his camp wants him to take the right strategic steps to become a big movie star. Dating a reality show star would tarnish his image"... That the BBC have reported that David Carradine was found with in a wardrobe "with a rope tied to his neck and genitals... It is unclear whether he committed suicide or not, or he died of suffocation, or heart failure due to an orgasm"... That a spokesperson for the actor said: "All we can say is, we know David would never have committed suicide"... The memory of Michael Hutchence lives on...  That mother of one, Ashlee Simpson, has apologised to Michelle Trachtenberg for her behaviour towards her at arecent DJ Hero soiree... The New York Post reports: "'Things got out of control,' an insider was quoted. An increasingly loud Simpson began to give (Pete) Wentz a lap dance while staring directly at Michelle and hurling insults at her. 'She was grinding up on Pete like a stripper. It was actually pretty disgusting'... Things reached a climax when Simpson screamed at a confused Trachtenberg, 'I hope you know, the whole time you were dating Pete, I was f***ing him!'"... That's nice... Ashlee should probably be more concerned with who he's f***ing now...  That you know the story with Caught Out... 

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