That Kerry Katona has gotten away with karate kicking in the direction of her accountant: "In order to decide whether or not to prosecute, the Crown Prosecution Service carefully reviewed the evidence, including pictures of the injuries to the alleged victim and eyewitness statements. However, eyewitnesses varied in their accounts of the assault, resulting in a conflict of evidence. In light of this, we decided that there was insufficient evidence for a realistic prospect of conviction in respect of the assault allegation"... That, in response to the claims that Stephen Gately "choked on his own vomit" after an "eight hour drinking binge", Gerald Kean said: "An eight-hour drinking session is something we do not accept. Wherever that is coming from (The Sun), our information would suggest that is simply wrong. We are not saying he was not drinking but eight hours is not something we accept... He was a very sensible man. He enjoyed himself, he loved life. I was with him many a night and, if anything, late into nights he would look as though he had just arrived"... That, of Alex Reid's alter-ego Roxanne, Peter Andre said: "Whatever people are doing in their private lives, and that goes for them or anyone, can you please not do it in front of the kids. I'm not going to criticise, I'm not going to say, 'How dare you do this or that', just don't do it in front of the kids. Give me that little bit of respect"... That Alex was spotted angrily attacking a packet of Monster Munch while Jordan partook in a Halloween shoot with the kids ('cause parading them about dressed up in a glossy mag is fine with Peter)... An eyewitness at East Sussex's Wadhurst Castle said: "The shoot went well. But Katie didn't want Alex in many of the shots, which wound him up. It all seemed very tense. There had obviously been a row". That Alex Wanted to get dressed up as the witch... That Katy Perry is flying Russell Brand over to LA to meet the parents: "Katy is as besotted with Russell as he is with her. However, her parents are extraordinarily strict Christians (they're evangelical, wouldn't you know). Katy is sure that, after a bit of getting used to him, they would approve of Russell, but she wants to get that initial meeting out of the way as early as she can. Keith and Mary are devoted to the church and hold the institution of marriage as a central core of their beliefs. They are genuinely happy for their daughter, but want to give Russell the once-over to check that he is, in fact, as suitable as Katy claims"... He might want to show them the picture Katy sent him of her poetic boobs... That Katie Holmes has insisted that Suri be sent to a Catholic school: "Katie has been listening to her parents who are devout Catholics. She is not convinced by Scientology (possibly after being forced to sit in a sauna for days) and has told Tom that she wants Suri to be educated as a Catholic - as she was. They had been having huge problems agreeing on her school. To say they were having arguments it putting it mildly - but Tom came around to the idea in the end"... That Sienna Miller and Jude Law were "reunited" in New York over the weekend at a party Johnny Lee Miller threw for (get this) Sienna's dog, Bess, to celebrate her recovery from a kidney operation... That Amy Winehouse has had a boob job worth £35k... That Cristiano Ronaldo is to replace David Beckham as the new face/oversized wang of Emporio Armani... That Heidi Montag wants another boob job: "I have a curvy butt now and bigger boobs will enhance my shape"... That Heidi also said it's her aim to become an "iconic sex symbol" and her recent "Playboy shoot is the first step"... That her ultimate goal in life might be scuppered by the inevitable visual every male will get of Spencer Pratt sweating over her... That's not iconic or sexy... That Paris Hilton has spent $4,500 on a Royal Dandie miniature pig, who will be known as "Princess Pigelette"... That Paris fails to see the irony continuously... That you can see what other celebrities are up to in Caught Out...
