All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That Cheryl has agreed to meet up with Ashley for "fifteen minutes"... The 26-year-old said to a discrete aide: "I can't imagine what he's got to say to my face that he hasn't already left messages about. What's he going to tell me that I haven't heard before?"... That he had this to roar at a photographer from the balcony of his French rehabilitation centre (where he's receiving treatment for his hurty ankle, not for being a sex pest): "Why don't you just f*** off? F*** off, you're scum. You've ruined my life! Why doesn't everyone just leave me alone? I'm here trying to get treatment"... That the pair are to meet in their Surry mansion (called Hurtmore House, I kid you not) on Monday...That Lady GaGa was en route to the MAC Viva Glam Launch when wearing this get up yesterday, which kind of warrants it... no?... Speaking of her fans, she said: "I see them every night and they are so beautiful and precious and lovely, but some of them are insecure and very troubled and not confident. I meet them and they cry, and they say 'Gaga you make me feel like I belong.' And I think to myself about that one girl or those hundreds of thousands of girls who meet that guy at a club who makes them feel like they belong and they don't have that negotiation. We all know that having sex without a condom is... Russian roulette"... Now that the booze and drugs have seeped from Brooke Mueller's being, she wants to divorce Charlie Sheen: "Brooke wants out. She's said it before and she's saying it again right now. She's worried though, because Charlie has a lot of dirt on her. Using drugs while raising children is obviously a horrible situation. The marriage is a nightmare. But each one is worried about ways the other one can hurt them (sure isn't that what most solid Hollywood marriages are based on?). For Charlie, he's terrified Brooke can help Colorado prosecutors send him to jail. For Brooke, she knows Charlie knows all the dirt about her drug and alcohol use"... That, of Cameron Douglas being sent to jail for dealing Crystal Meth, father Michael Douglas said: "My priorities were very similar to my father's. Career first"... That a warrant has been issued for the arrest of Ronald Reagan's grandson, also called Cameron: "he blew off a court date for a marijuana arrest... That Banksy: Exit Through the Gift Shop premiered last night in London, and featured the usual stream of red carpet fodder, includingDaisy Lowe, her ex (d'you remember?) Mark Ronson, Rhys Ifans (who narrates the film, and appears to have aged substantially in the last year), Keith Allen(who doesn't narrate but looks just as f***ed), Jamie bleedin' Winstone in an uber unfortunate onesie, Thandie Newton, and someone actually going by the name Elisa Doolittle... There were, of course, no pictures of Banksy... That of kissing Megan Fox and Julianne Moore, Amanda Seyfried shattered many an illusion by saying: "I had to kiss Megan in Jennifer's Body and it was not very comfortable at all. I did it because that was what the story was all about but it's awkward being with a woman in that way, trying to make it look natural... I had to do it again with Julianne Moore in Chloe and somehow it was easier with her but it still felt really strange"... That Blanche Hunt's last will and testament is due to be read on Corrie in May... That, from beyond the grave, she'll inform Norris she wants to cancel her subscription to Crossword Monthly, banishes Betty's Hotpots from her wake, and accuses "serial cheat" Ken of trying to bury her "on the cheap"... Maggie, you are still missed...