That Kate Moss's recently robbed home has now been doused in sewage: "Trouble started following heavy rains over the last bank holiday and culminated in her basement flooding and the pump system clogging up. Kate is absolutely gutted (not unlike her house). Not only is her house a complete disaster zone, with mud, gunge and sewage everywhere, she recently had some walls repainted in Farrow & Ball paint at great expense. They are ruined. She has been told she is looking at a bill of around £100,000 to replace her outside deck, plus kitchen units, furniture and flooring"... That Courtney Love has been dumped by millionaire Andre Balazs: "Andre was very fond of Courtney, but found some of her behaviour embarrassing. And after a series of rows last week - including one over why she felt the need to 'out' Kate - he told her it was over"... That her recent antics in New York's Boom Boom Room probably paid their part too: "When Courtney and Andre decided to call it a night and hail a cab, Andre was stopped by a woman he knew. As soon as he started talking to her, Courtney hit the roof. It was obvious to everyone that the woman was a business associate, but not to Courtney. She acted like a toddler! It got so bad that the woman Andre was talking to got really embarrassed and he had to apologise and walk away. By then Courtney was screaming and crying"... That Monica Bellucci has become a mother for the second time... That Fergie (that being the Duchess of York, not the piddling Pea warbler) has apologised for attempting to make £500k to provide "access" to Prince Andrew: "I very deeply regret the situation and the embarrassment caused. My financial situation is under stress - however, that is no excuse for a serious lapse in judgment. I am very sorry this has happened. I can confirm the Duke of York was not aware or involved in any of the discussions that occurred. I am sincerely sorry for my actions"... That the dancer Ronan Keating's been carrying on with is one 26-year-old Francine Cornell: "Francine had become quite indiscreet. She told more than one friend this year she couldn't date other men as she was with Ronan. It was as if she wanted people to know. By that time they'd been having an affair for months - it had become an open secret in the dancing community"... That Jesse James is due to "tell all" on ABC's Nightline on Tuesday. Some excerpts of the pre-recorded interview have been released and it's the same old shite: he was on a mission to "self sabotage a perfect life" yaddah, yaddah, blah... That Kara Tointon and Joe Swash have split... That Doctor Who's Matt Smith and Daisy Lowe have split: "It's a confusing one (um, not really. Rather a simple case of chaser's remorse). At first, Matt was the keen one and couldn't get enough of Daisy. But when she really got into him as well, their relationship just fizzled... Everyone thought they'd be together ages as they were totally into each other. But Matt's really chilled out and they mix in totally different circles. They actually don't share many common interests at all"... That Sinitta needs to back the f*** off: "I'd like to give him (Simon, of course) away. It would be sad though. I said before he got engaged that I never thought he would get married"... Of any children Cowell might have with his bride to be, Sinitta said: "I'd love to be a godmother"... When Sinitta isn't talking about Simon Cowell, she's saying even less interesting stuff like this: "Okay, stay tuned for the mega announcement any day now! It's what I have always wanted and at LAST it's finally happening in the coolest way!"... That she's found a boiling pot big enough to fit Mezhgan... That TMZ are now saying Simon Monjack passed away of a drug's overdose... That Tila Tequila has agreed to go on VH1's Celebrity Rehab, "if it doesn't get cancelled first"... Feast your peepers on the final gallery from Cannes - the closing ceremony featuring Juliette Binoche, Salma Hayek, Kristen Scott Thomas, Kate Beckinsale after a load of Magnums, Benicio Del Toro, Kirsten Dunst, Diane Kruger, Charlotte Gainsburg, anyone else who's been lurking about for the past two weeks...

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