That Jamie Oliver has posted a picture of newborn son (his fourth child courtesy of wife Jools) on his Twitter... He looks as expected... That Wayne Rooney has been ordered to apologise to Coleen's parents in person this weekend... That Ashton Kutcher is peeved Star Magazine keeps insisting he's cheating with younger ladies he picks up at bowling alleys: "A 21-year-old woman has claimed that after meeting the Punk’D star at a bowling alley and slipping him her number, they later had sex on a couch in the house Kutcher shares with Moore and her daughters (apparently he didn't want to do it in the marital bed). 'He's a great lover,' Brittney Jones told Star magazine. 'Very considerate and sweet. And it was very special to me. I felt totally comfortable in his arms. It was tender and nice - not some random sex act' (no, it was totally special). In a statement to Us Weekly the actor’s lawyer said: 'Star Magazine continuously publishes lies about Ashton Kutcher and many other celebrities. This is not the first, nor will it be the last time they engage in reckless conduct'"... Smoke, fire, and so on... That Damian Hurley already wants to be a freeloader in life... His mum Liz Hurley said: "Damian adores being photographed - in fact he likes anything to do with showbusiness. He's written his first screenplay called Escape! and many pop songs which he performs on the dining room table, singing into a hairspray can. He spends hours trying to persuade me to do movies again so I can take him out of school to be tutored in my trailer. Needless to say, this is not going to happen"... For many, many reasons... That, of requesting time following his split with Charlotte Church, Welsh rugby's Gavin Henson said: "I had heart-to-heart talks with the Ospreys, I opened my heart to them really, told them what had gone on, I told them for compassionate reasons, for my mental state of mind, I need to go somewhere for the season. I just felt a bit embarrassed to go back into the changing room with the boys, the Ospreys. They know me so well, they would be asking me personal questions and I wasn't quite ready for that. I just wanted to have a season away"... to dance around bare-chested in a rhinestone one piece on live TV every Saturday... That Johnny Depp went out on the lock with Keith Richards in London last night... Johnny had to be "helped to his car"... Behold the future... That Annette Bening and Warren Beatty are on the verge of splitting: "The National Enquirer (it must be true) reported last month that Bening and Beatty are fighting and finger-pointing over their daughter, Kathlyn (AKA Stephen Ira), 18, and her plans to have gender-reassignment surgery. The Enquirer reports Bening has agreed to pay for the surgery. Annette accepts that Kathlyn wants to surgically become a man (she's footing the bill), while Warren is 'still trying to come to terms with it'"... That Kim Kardashian and her mother Kris Jenner spent roughly $100k on Hermes handbags while in Paris this week... Let me rephrase that slightly, $100k on SEVEN Hermes handbags: "Kim and her mother Kris purchased six of the label's exclusive Birkin bags... valued at around $10,000 apiece. But here's the kicker - sources close to the reality star tell TMZ, Kim also bought herself an extremely rare crocodile-skin bag from the upscale French boutique... with a price tag of $30,000"... That several people, myself included, have just brought up some lunch...

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