All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That Robbie Williams get's pricked twice a week with a sharp Testosterone injection: "To cut a long story short I went to get some HGH (human growth hormone). It's what all the old fellas are on out there in LA that's making them look 40 instead of 60. It's improving their health, their memory, their hair, skin. Could give you cancer. I weighed that up. Thought I'd have it anyway. Went to see a Hollywood doctor. Had my blood tests. Went back. He said, 'You don't need HGH. You've got the testosterone of a 100-year-old man.' And then everything made sense (like not wanting to have sex with his female wife). It was kind of an epiphany that day"... That Paris Hilton changed her outfit three times yesterday, just for the sheer hell of it, she's not trying to promote anything or anything... That if you speak ancient Greek, Latin, French and Spanish, can master two instruments and have been Oxbridge educated, get yerselves round to Martin/Paltrow abode: "The Scientist singer - who has a first-class degree in Greek and Latin - and his film star missus are offering a £60,000 salary for two to four hours' work a day at their home in Belsize Park, North London. Other perks include all expenses paid, free use of a West London flat and free travel with the couple and their kids when they fly abroad. They have already interviewed hopefuls following their advert on Tutors-International.com. Their pal added: 'They want someone to go with them wherever they need them, be that America or anywhere else. But with that kind of deal for teaching two hours a day - you would, wouldn't you?'"... That Lily Allen is so upbeat about her wedding she's hiring in extra police to keep people who give two tosses about her away... She's also intent on inconveniencing the locals: "The singer, 26, weds builder Sam Cooper, 32, next Saturday in sleepy Cranham, Gloucs. The main road around the village will be closed. Locals are to get passes to allow them in. A police spokesman said: "The couple agreed to pay for extra officers. They will ensure minimal disruption"... That Julie Burchill is not one of Lily's fans: "After the columnist called Allen an "over-privileged cry-baby" in a piece about Cheryl Cole, Allen responded on Twitter, calling Burchill a "bitter old troll" and "a bit of a self-loather"... Burchill replied: "No, Lily, dear. I Love me. I Loathe you! And BTW being called self-loathing by you is like being called fat by Dawn French. Clown!"...

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