Tonight on the Food Network, the TV show known as Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives starts it 21st season.
Yes, that's right. Twenty One. We’re as shocked as you are, so we've decided to remind ourselves of the most Guy Fieri things that have ever happened in this world of ours to mark the momentous occasion for the show, which Fieri likes to refer to as Triple D in a thinly-veiled double entendre. Actually, that's a bit generous, it's more like a scantily-clad partial entendre. Anyway, on with the list.
1) The hairdresser fight
Yes, you're looking at a man who pays someone to style his hair, and presumably that beard thing that he has going on. However, Guy and the guy he pays to style him had a huge falling out, according to TMZ, which lead to Fieri throwing him out of a car, and footage of them fighting in the street hit the internet.
2) S'mores pizza
Guy Fieri's recipes have a certain je ne sais quoi to them, and to an extent, that explains how he has so many successful restaurants and his own range of food that you can find in the freezer aisle in supermarkets across the US. However, there is very little that can explain his bizarre chocolate s'mores "gourmet" pizza which is just...we don't know. We read a review where someone said that it was spicy. Why would it be spicy, Guy? Why?
3) The Guy Fieri compliment
We have to say this about Guy, he has a unique way with words, and when it comes to complimenting food, "that's good" or "it tastes nice" is about as close to an insult as you can get from him. That's why he insists on coming up with bizarre phrases that really make little or no sense when he's enjoyed a meal at whatever dive he happens to be in on the show. Thankfully, someone on the internet created a Guy Fieri quote generator so you too can learn to talk about the beautiful place that is known as Flavourtown, or learn how to make someone feel special by telling them their meal is "money".
4) The fake Guy Fieri
As we already mentioned, Fieri has a number of successful restaurants, and while his menu is unique, there was at least one person in the world who is more Guy than Guy himself, and created this rather hilarious piss take of his menu where you can get ‘Football: The Meal’ which is served in a black bag and hurled at you from 40 yards, or ‘Panamania!’ which comes served with a beer that you need to squeeze out of a Hawaiian shirt.
5) Guy Fieri's giant wedding bash
Guy has been accused of homophobia in the past, so he was out to make amends when he officiated over 101 gay weddings in Florida last month. Apparently guests at the mass ceremony were served "a feast of fried chicken, grilled lamb, crab-stuffed avocadoes, empanadas and a seven-tier gold and silver cake from Duff Goldman, star of Food Network’s reality show Ace of Cakes". Presumably they were all brought to tears by a moving speech from Guy that covered the long and storied history of his love affair with ghost peppers and frosted tips.
At this juncture, you're probably thinking to yourself how can Guy marry someone? Well, he's been ordained to do so by the Universal Life Church, and joins other celebrities like Conan O'Brien who got his qualification (if that's what you want to call it) online.
6) Guy Fieri pointing
Guy loves a good point, which is evidenced by this picture of Guy Fieri pointing at a list of 27 pictures of Guy Fieri pointing at stuff that BuzzFeed did. Meta.
— Guy Fieri (@GuyFieri) May 13, 2014
Super Extra Bonus Fieri: Guy eating in reverse. We hope you’re not about to have your dinner…