D-Tox

Actors: Sylvester Stallone, Angela Alvarado, Christopher Fulford, Polly Walker, Sean Patrick Flanery, Tom Berenger, Charles Dutton

Release Date: Monday 30th November -0001

Running time: 92 minutes

Say what you like about Sylvester Stallone, but the guy knows how to make bad movies. No sooner had this reviewer got over the nightmares caused by Sly's most recent effort, Driven, than the erstwhile Rocky only appears in an even worse film. This time, our boy plays FBI Agent Jake Malloy, who when we first meet him, is on the trail of a serial killer with a taste for police blood. Unfortunately, just as the FBI begins to get a handle on the case, the killer murders Jake's girlfriend. From there, he spirals into a pattern of booze and self-abuse before he checks into a remote rehab institution, designed especially for cops. Just as Jake unpacks his bags, the recovering addicts begin dying in mysterious circumstances. Aside from asking us to suspend disbelief when it comes to casting (Sly Stallone as a crack homicide investigator? Please!), D-Tox is brimming with the sort of ham-fisted clichés and substandard plotting that anyone on nodding terms with sanity would find idiotic. In a word? Rancid. Someone please take this man's career away now.