Oh, Sandy, Sandy, Sandy - from the only person dressed decently at last week's People Choice Awards to looking like you've crawled into a patchwork pillow at the Golden Globes. We get it, you were in a space movie, you don't have to look like a novelty rocket launcher. Still, you weren't the worst there...
I know it may seem like we keep picking on Drew Barrymore, which isn't best practise given she's currently with child, but there are better ways of dressing a bump; they shouldn't look like - let's say - a fairy cake.
Drew could've taken a leaf out of fellow pregnant Olivia Wilde's book. In saying that, we'd prefer to see a baby burst forth out of a cake (stop thinking of strippers for the moment), and not from a reptilian belly, like summat of of V.
Hayden Panetierre, Pepe Le Pew wants his hair/dress back. She is looking particularly skeezy with the hair. And we know halternecks are all in, but this is the wrong kind.
Not that we can read people's minds, but Kaley Cuoco's looking a bit "seriously, did I totally cock up with this dress? You'd tell me, right?" And she'd be right. It's all bit 'Cyndi goes formal for Girls Just Wanna Have Fun reboot.'
Yep, we hear you Zoe Saldana. We too need a pain killer of some sort before we address everything going on here. Less is more, missus, less is more.
It's Julia Roberts impersonating Tina Fey, impersonating Sarah Palin.
Keeping with Tina Fey; it appears she pilfered her red carpet dress off Kat Dennings.
Heidi Klum's looking a bit like the private booth of a lapdancing club... Squinting helps.
And, in a Golden Globes red carpet first, we have dresses interpretation of a 'side vagina'. What, you didn't actually expect us to have actual side vagina on display?! Are you outta your mind?! This is the INTERNET! Moving on, Paula Patton chose to wear what one Leandra Medine described as "Side vagina is the new sideboob as demonstrated by Paula Patton?". Patton's dress choice has also been described as a 'Kleenex' and a bit like a poodle tripping off its box, so you can see why we went with the side vag analogy.
For those of you looking for actual side vag (there'll be no judgement cast here), may we point you in the direction of Lady (HAH!) Victoria Hervey... Yikes.
