Alec Baldwin is as mad as hell, and he's not going to take this anymore. Instead of sticking his head out of his window, he's instead roared his head off in a 5,300 word essay posted by Vulture.

The highlights include him calling MSNBC "full of sh*t", empathising with Shia LaBeouf, refusing to interview Rob Lowe for some reason, and calling TMZ's Harvey Levin a "cretinous barnacle on the press."

So, why is Alec "done with public life" this time around - apart from the usual, which is Alec needing to blow off some steam in spectacular style every one-to-two years. From what we can gather, Baldwin was "wrongly accused" of using a gay slur against a TMZ photographer back in November. Alec says he officiated at a friend's gay wedding and therefore isn't a homophobe.

Recalling the incident, he says the snapper "ambushed me as I was putting my family in a car, and I chased him down the block and said, 'C---sucking mother---er' or whatever (when I have some volatile interaction with these people, I don’t pull out a pen and take notes on what I said)."

He pointed out that he did not use a racial slur, which is allegedly why MSNBC suspended/fired him last November from a talk show he "never wanted to be part of in the first place."

According to Hollywoodreporter.com: "'I want to keep it simple," he says. "I get somebody in a chair and I shoot the shit with them for an hour and a half and we cut it into a one-hour show. … My show was meant to be as harmless and inoffensive as could be.' But Baldwin claims that MSNBC chief [Phil] Griffin wanted to change up the format. While Baldwin came to believe being on MSNBC was a mistake, he says, he decided he'd give it a try. It was suggested that he bring in Rob Lowe, who happened to have an upcoming meeting in the building, as a guest. But Baldwin declined. The first episode of Up Late debuted Oct. 11, in a 10 p.m. Friday time slot. After five weeks, the talker was down 40 percent from the premiere. Its final episode averaged just 395,000 viewers and 101,000 adults 25-54."

It appears the game was up once Baldwin got suspended over the photographer incident: "Although [Griffin] appeared to have some buyer’s remorse, he told me to hang in there... After the TMZ event, he said, 'Don’t worry. I have to suspend you. But this will blow over.' I have all the emails to prove it. And then, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, MSNBC said, 'You’re fired.'"

During his rant, he found some time to empathise with Shia. Of the brown bag incident, he said "there was truly a part of me that felt sorry for him, oddly enough." As a result, we doubt Alec will be partaking in some 'ort' exhibition anytime soon. What will he do with all his free time now that's he's retired? Going to find Jesus with his brother Stephen could be an option. Should keep him occupied for a while anyway.