Just moments ago, the birth was announced of Pippa Middleton's first baby, a boy, with the news handed to Simon McCoy in the middle of a broadcast.
Yet again, Simon McCoy was so disinterested, so painfully and utterly unimpressed by the news, that the energy generated from his sheer contempt is enough to power a modern city. It's breathtaking to behold, quite frankly, and should be preserved for future generations to bask in.
If there were awards for levels of not giving a flying f**k, Simon McCoy should win every one of them because that man is so checked out when it comes to this stuff, it almost makes you want to see what else he doesn't care about.
We should all aspire to have this level of disinterest and cynicism in our lives.
Behold.
oh my god @BBCSimonMcCoy just announced that Pippa Middleton had given birth and it was PEAK SIMON MCCOY pic.twitter.com/1LSotCJpQV
— Scott Bryan (@scottygb) October 16, 2018