Kelly Osbourne's Subtlety Knows No Bounds...

The media have a thing for "post break up outfits." They were most interested in the attire of Jennifer Aniston, Hilary Swank and Kate Winslet after they parted ways with their respective others, going to extreme lengths to photograph them immediately post split as if a jumper is a magical portal into someone's current mindset.

This is probably why Kelly Osbourne has opted for "bona fide harlot" as one of her PBUOs (another being this coquettish number from the Emmys). Here she is, naturally parading around the streets of L.A. before and after she appeared alongside the Pussy Cat Dolls (indeed, they're still gyrating up a storm) and Extra Pussy Cat for hire Carmen Electra at the Viper Room on Wednesday night.

Those who came to whoop encouragement included Eva Longoria, yer wan Malin Akerman, and - of course - her ma Sharon, which is nice (the presence of Ozzy and Jack might've been a bit weird).

So, anyway Luke, here's your ex-fiance who you (allegedly) did the dirt on, just going about her business while interchanging between a malleable backless disco ball, and Vegas hooker chic, in the presence of a 'star spangled pirate can-can wench' and a 'futuristic flapper trollop' (AKA Mia).

And doesn't she look good... and not just because she's got the rubbered features of Robin Antin attached to her side. For the second time this week (voila the first), I've found myself thinking "My, Kelly Osbourne looks universally doable. Plaudits"

Not that I'm pressing women to objectify themselves at every given turn, but there's no harm flaunting it a bit when the ex has been an ungrateful plank.