It's been a rough aul week for James May, what with the current question mark over his gig on Top Gear thanks to Clarkson, his doorstepping by British press and the resulting self-placed house arrest he's under to avoid them.
Thankfully May has found plenty of things to distract him, and has been sharing them with the world on Twitter thick and fast with the hashtags #Unemployed, #StillUnemployed and #SU, which we imagine is 'still unemployed' cut down to save characters.
Once I've done the plumbing, I'm going to fire up Little Honda to see if Norman Tebbit's 'on yer bike' philosophy works. #StillUnemployed
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 19, 2015
I've been given some heavy gardening work today. Temptation to cut my own head off with the chainsaw may prove too strong. #StillUnemployed
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 20, 2015
I'm actually at the point where I'm considering washing my own car. That Albanian bloke* will be furious. #Unemployed *TG News S22/4
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 21, 2015
Woodwork tasks today. Being jobless allows you to revisit old interests, learn new things, and listen to the radio more. Sold the telly. #SU
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 22, 2015
Excellent Early Music Show on Radio 3 at 2 o'clock. They's gonna get mediaeval on yo ass. #Radio #StillUnemployed
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 22, 2015
I've sorted out that difficult cupboard under the sink. #StillUnemployed
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 23, 2015
I'm re-learning the recorder. My objective is The British Grenadiers. #StillUnemployed pic.twitter.com/kgy4M9m8Nb
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 24, 2015
I've just eaten something called an 'active yoghurt'. I think I'll have a lie down. #SU
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 24, 2015
I have an hp Envy printer and it keeps making random copies of nothing and spewing out blank paper. Anyone else had this? #StillUnemployed
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 25, 2015
It's doing it now. Drives me up the fuggin wall. That stupid whirring noise makes me want to kill people. #SU
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 25, 2015
SOD OFF PRINTER!!!!!!!!!!
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 25, 2015
Reporters outside my house: if you're going to hang around on small streets with your car engines idling all day, don't buy a bloody diesel.
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 25, 2015
I've written some blues lyrics: Oh I woke up this morning, And.... #StillUnemployed
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 27, 2015
And then this evening we were blessed with his rendition of 'British Grenadiers' on a recorder.
British Grenadiers is up. WARNING: crap content #SU https://t.co/Uibl3lGygK
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 27, 2015
Blessed. We're truly blessed.
Why are you all commenting on this rubbish? Get on with your work, you slackers. Greensleeves next.
— James May (@MrJamesMay) March 27, 2015
He's either lost his mind completely, or playing one very entertaining game with us all.
