Yeah we know the party line - we all think Fair City is crap - and we can all happily slag it off until the cows come home, but then why does it have so many viewers, 'ey?
Admit it, when you close those curtains in the evening and it's just you and your television, it's the familiar theme tune of Fair City you long to hear.
Call it a hate-watch, a guilty pleasure, or maybe you genuinely like it, whatever the reason, you're out there Fair City fans, whether you care to admit it or not.
Here's why we know you love it:
1. It's a small town lifestyle but in Dublin
Does anything even exist past Carrigstown? Does it? They talk about going into town sometimes but yet somehow always only end up going from McCoys to The Station. Probably safer that way... oh wait.
2. They get to drink all the time
Breakfast, lunch and dinner, it's grand to be in the pub at any hour of the day in soapland.
3. They finally freed Katy
It was the storyline that had the nation gripped, that they teased us with for an entire year, when oh when would Katy escape? There was a petition and all. At least they gave it a somewhat satisfying conclusion and even made a point of showing the PSTD Katy clearly went though after and didn't just snap her back into normal life. She's away now healing herself and whatnot for what we all know will be an inevitable showdown between her and the MIA Ciaran next year.
4. Paul Brennan lights you up like a Christmas Tree
To quote a famous line used by the man himself, this Carrigstown lothario has been wooing the ladies since day dot. He's no Bella Doyle though, he was a right divil in his time.
5. It actually has had quite a few groundbreaking moments over the years
Back in 1996, the soap had Irish TV's first (almost) gay kiss, and most recently, Ireland's first transgender TV character.
6. It made a heartthrob of George McMahon AKA Mondo in the early noughties.
Don't judge us.
7. Everybody sort of hates and loves everyone in equal measure
A character could be your best friend one minute and then plotting your demise the next. No-one ever really knows where they stand in Carrigstown.
8. The acting can be so bad it's good sometimes
In fairness, apparently they get feck all rehearsal time but the actors sometimes sound like they're straight from their Transition Year play. Although there have been some stellar performances clocked in by some of the regulars over the years, so we'll give them that. Just stop it with the over-done American accents already, nobody's buying it.
9. They got knocked down, but they get up again
From stalking and threatening your ex-wife with a shotgun to literally killing your da, there's not much people can't get over in Carrigstown, and you just know young Katy will be back bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in no time, not a bother on her.
Just admit it already, you watch Fair City. Say it loud and proud.... in your sitting room... where nobody can hear you.